Emergency Summit needed....

One of the most difficult tasks on this journey is deciding what to eat.   I know that sounds crazy, but it's true.  I mean, eating is a pretty simple thing really. Regardless, I feel like I have painted myself into a corner, nutritionally speaking.  How did I get so fat again?  

After years of research and the experience of bad choices, one would think that I would know the clearest, most convenient, and direct route to eating for healthy weight loss.  And one would be wrong.   I do know a thing or two (in theory) about what to eat, but I think I have information overload…and my execution is terrible!  I need to whittle this mess in my head down to something manageable.   I need to take the time to figure out what information to keep and what to throw out.  Here I am living in the land of plenty, yet starving on a nutritional and cellular level.  I am definitely doing something wrong.  Life is a virtual smorgasbord in America, but some days I feel like I'm living through the Great Irish Potato Famine.  Hungry, with no viable options for nutrition.

As overweight as I am, you'd think I'd been partying in Italy all year.  Ironically enough, I think I have just placed too many restrictions on myself.  I don't even know what I'm "allowed" to eat anymore, so out of desperation I usually end up grabbing something fast and convenient (unhealthy and processed).   Non bene.  

Stepping back and looking at it objectively, the problem is pretty obvious.   I mean, just look at my current guidelines for permissible foods:  no meat, nothing processed, nothing frozen, no sugar, no dairy, no eggs, must be organic, no artificial sweeteners, no gluten, low on the glycemic index, and must be somewhat easy to prepare.  So, yeah…I pretty much just described celery.   No wonder I feel so desperate.

It's embarrassing really.  I feel like a deer caught in the headlights the second I walk into a grocery store (or restaurant, or even my own kitchen some days!).   I walk in; grab a basket or cart, then stop right there, and just stand, looking at the aisles before me with a gazillion thoughts flying around my head, not knowing where to start.  I feel overwhelmed and scared.  So, I hurry up and grab something that's "not so bad" and quick and easy to make.  Then I get the heck out of dodge while the gettin' is good!  Pretty much, this usually means I grab something that's "not so healthy" from the frozen food section, or pasta...again.  Yep.  I need a better plan. 

My usual experience at the grocery store, and eating in general, can best be summed up with that line from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - "Water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink."  That is exactly how I feel.  Clearly, I need to loosen up on some of my self-imposed rules and sanctions.  I want to be able to eat more than celery and green juice every day.  I need to find a happy medium.  I am driving myself mad!  So, today's goal?  An emergency summit with self to review the state of the union and to decide the best and healthiest options going forward.  Now THAT is a good plan!!